\t\t\t\tsitting next to some college types who are confused about their futures,
\ntheir pasts, if not their presents. thye can not drink. howls of laughter
\nat banal deadpans.
\nin comes the one employee of this place who has professional training and
\neven a degree in thisrealm.
\nis this how it works?
\nthis place is wildly busy, and that’s all good. but is htis a religion?
\nshe was sitting at home on a saturday night when the call came that the
\nplace where she works was as busy as its ever been. they are turning
\ncustomers away, telling them there is no room here, no seats, no standing
\nroom, go somewhere else. hey, it’s not some butthole bar in
\nNowheresville (that’s an Elvis town). theree are other places around. i
\nthink this place has actually reached maximum legal capacity. which i
\nthink is 65 human beings. at present i think there are 4 or maybe 5
\nemployees working a room of at least 60. the bartender is not a happy man
\nright now but he got his backup in the form of the degree-granted one who
\nstepped into the maelstrom and got straight to work. now someone cant find
\nthe kahlua, now someone can’t undersand what the asshole customer is
\ndemanding, now someone wants a break, a cigarette break. everyone is tired
\nalready, even the ones who just got here. there is a bizarre looking HERO
\nsammich on the other side of the counter. i don’t understand it, or where
\nit came from. o, awesome, now someone wants a MOJITO. i don’t know if it
\nis the most complicated drink ever concocted but who needs that combat
\nright now? makes that 2 MOJITI, which are fabulous concoctions, i should
\ntry one this summer, but they are murder on the bartender. aha, i am aout
\nto tell the bartender, Mojitos for everyone, on my tab
\nthat will lose me friends and disinfluence peoples.<\/p>\n
i don’t understand the monstrous HERO sammich on the other side of the
\nbar. is that really a purse? a handbag? what the fck is it? it looks like
\na marbled mass of ham and salami and cheeses, with a strangely decorative
\nbowl of salad dressing on top, like a crown.<\/p>\n
hot babes, homely babes, uneasy dudes, confident dudes. a college girl is
\ndescribing an enormous plastic penis, and extending her right hand toward
\nto northeast as if to clarify what she means by enormous plastic penis.
\nnow she is laughing and absorbing the ambivalent stares from the two
\nnon-plastic dudes on both sides of her.<\/p>\n
and my battery is running dry.<\/p>\n
oh, jeez, the massive marbles HERO sammich is no sammich at all, it is a
\nhandbag, of bright read and white swirling patterns which, from across the
\nbar, and in the slight darkness of this place, looked to thee eyes like a
\ndamn sammich. then the woman itting by the fabled sammich of puzzling
\nenormity reached into the beast and pulled out some lip balm. once i saw
\nthe top flap of sammich skin lifted i knew something was not right with
\nthat sammich.<\/p>\n
(sammiches are served in Nowheresville).<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
sitting next to some college types who are confused about their futures, their pasts, if not their presents. thye can not drink. howls of laughter at banal deadpans. in comes the one employee of this place who has professional training and even a degree in thisrealm. is this how it works? this place is wildly […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[29],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1323","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-text","et-doesnt-have-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/saumAn-whatwhat","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1323","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1323"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1323\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1323"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1323"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1323"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}