Yesterday, as happens so many days, I witnessed a parade of individuals board an MTA bus without paying a fare. This happened a few weeks ago, on a Q44 in the Bronx. It happened again yesterday on an M103 in Manhattan. I didn’t keep count but easily over a dozen people strolled onto the bus with no intention of paying nor was there any apparent awareness that payment was expected. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It struck me in this particular instance because I had gone out of my way to pay the fare after boarding this SBS bus through one of the rear doors. I was greeted with an OMNY card reader that did not accept payment, instructing all who boarded through the rear door to board up front. So why did the rear door open to begin with? It should never have opened if no payment was accepted there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I did what was right. I ambled all the way to the front of the snaking and lengthy SBS to pay my fare like a good boy scout. I could alsmot certainly have forgone this task and remained a free man, fareless. But I did it and felt that small chasm of nothingness that comes with being an honest individual. The money I could have saved by not paying my fares every day could, over a year, have helped pay down the credit card or perhaps purchase a new and worthy desktop PC. Instead it went toward the fallacy of being honest, and doing what is right. There is no reward in it, only stigma and suspicion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I got to work early, and am making use of this plug-in monitor I got about a month ago and have barely found time to make use of. I think it’s 15″, it plugs into and is powered by the Samsung phone, and it turns the phone screen into a laptop-size affair, solving a lot of pesky and petty annoyances. But there are few scenarios where this setup makes sense. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I rediscovered yesterday that it is indeed possible and now even stupid simple to map a remote server so it looks like a local drive on your home PC. I have done this in the past but it always ended up being flaky for some reason. Now there’s a freeware app for it and I’ve offloaded about half a gigabyte already of home videos and stuff to stream from Plex. I have a small army of external hard drives at home for this but offloading it to a remote server with over 20TB of storage just makes sense, assuming playback of this stuff is the same as when stored locally. So far I only uploaded this year’s collection of ShowerCAM videos, which I’ve found surprisingly entertaining to watch, at least in small doses. I sit hunched over my phone, playing games and watching porn for masturbatory fodder. I look like I’m happy there, and I guess I am. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I rediscovered something that the woman I was with last year sometimes did. I would call her from the shower, and talk whilst performing showerly ablutions. She was on speaker phone. It was pretty cool, really, the naturalness of things and how probably three-quarters of our time together I was altogether unclothed. When I got to her place the first order of business was for her to undress me. It was sweet, even if she herself is anything but sweet. I revisit that dalliance once in a while but can’t allow myself to go back. It was abusive but in a different way than previous experiences. I was abusing myself by staying in it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now I get a correspondence from a woman I knew years ago, an Italian, dropdead gorgeous but inaccessible in the flesh. She loved me, or so she claimed. She confided in me all the pain she went through after her mother died. That is how we met. It was overwhelming. Today I barely know what she is doing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This workplace is changing again. I no longer get the full floor all to myself on Sundays. That’s fine with me. It was just a flukey thing that made that happen. We now alternate between floors 2 days out of the week, which represents half of my work week now that I’m only here 4 days. The pear stems I placed thorughout this place are susprisingly still in place. Have I discussed the pear stems? Maybe next time… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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