The ambitious project of renovating the bathrooms here has made one thing obvious. I and others are going to have to seek other options. The FiDi isn’t the worst place to summon a clean, well-maintained shitter. But there is a matter of distance, which can be a spine-weaking journey when one really needs to defecate and the nearest outlet is 2 city blocks away, and possibly closed for maintenance. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
They have basically cut our quantity of shitters in half, increasing the likelihood that one will have a noisy\u00a0 shit-splatter in close proxitmity to a colleague or co-worker. I happen tobe experiencing a mild bout of diarrhea the past few days. I don’t want to inflict that vulgar, horse-piss sounding exhaust of blackened liquid within earshot, or earshit, of anyone who would recognize me and gossip about the new windows we have into our co-workers’ shitting profile.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’m thinking Oculus, Brookfield Place, and some other safe locations where there is enough noise to drown out even the most fire-hose seeming sound of a 20-second blast of liquid vileness. I remember shitting at the Lincoln Memorial, worried that what I knew was coming from my innards would overwhelm the room and cause people to exit their stalls asphyxiating and weeping tears of excruciating toxicity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But the place was well-suited for my event. So much noise and upward exhaust from fans and general people yelling, I think there was music playing, I could have shit louder than the thundercaps and felt like a minnow about it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The shitters at this workplace are way more intimate than the Lincoln Memorial. There will be a lot of us learning a lot about each other’s shit habits. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The ambitious project of renovating the bathrooms here has made one thing obvious. I and others are going to have to seek other options. The FiDi isn’t the worst place to summon a clean, well-maintained shitter. But there is a matter of distance, which can be a spine-weaking journey when one really needs to defecate […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[29],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-47978","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-text","et-doesnt-have-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paumAn-ctQ","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47978","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=47978"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47978\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47978"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=47978"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wsbj.com\/sorabji\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=47978"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}