i slept long hours last night, conquering about 10 hours of gin-induced catatonicism. when i rose i had a slight headhurt, as sometimes occurs in my lazy life. in the cabinet i found a stick of Head On, that “all natural” headache remedy promoted via commercials which apparently annoy the hell out of a lot of people (i don’t really mind them). this stick of Head On must have been in the cabinet for 5 years, since i think it’s been at least that long since i actually purchased such a strange product. nevertheless i thought i’d give it a try. i remembered using it once with what seemed like good results, and in the end i would have to say that the product does seem to have done something to ease the sliiight ache on the left side of my precious head. but the stick of Head On was gooey and old, not firm. it should go on like a deodorant but this went on like a liquid. it trickled down my forehead and into my left eye, causing both irritation and a little bit of concern, as i had no real idea what this stuff was. all seems well enough now but that moment of imagining that i’d damaged my eyeball on account of foolishly using a sketchy and expired product was kind of a lesson learned. maybe it’s not clear what lesson was learned… i do not look at myself very often. in the mirror, up close. i am a strange looking sight, looking not so much like i feel on the inside. i see myself these days mostly in the reflection of the flat screen computer monitor. i see my face go to rage and anger, the brow tightened and the mouth agape as software fails me throughout the day.