Job is starting to pile up on me. Starting? It’s been there for weeks, months even. I don’t care about getting fired. Would prefer it to quitting, given my original reasons for taking this gig.

Got in late. Subways were a mess. Saw the woman whose pencil-thin physique belies the towering place she has, at times, held in my mind. She moves swiftly, but stiffly. She seems suspicious, not of me but of all things, all people. A soul more delicate than she thinks.

According to news blips it seems the colonoscopy I’ve been so apathetic about getting done is not so miraculous after all. I’m 5 years late in getting one done. Given the vigor with which I wipe my ass (sometimes) I imagine I’ve stuffed pounds and pounds of residual waste back up the chute.

All around I’m more interested in what happens with Z, either tonight or, more likely, tomorrow. I was imagining the playful kisses, the sweet smile of anticipation when she closes her door behind us. The boner. Oh, the boner, in her hands and in her holiness. Not to get religious…

I slept with a permanent three-quarter hardon. A calming, comfortable level of hardness. I think I started humping a pillow but that could be manufactured memory. Why would I have to manufacture a memory like that?

All the video I posted to the swinger site are gone. That’s too bad. I guess it’s because they don’t want to keep video for non-paying people. I would have to do some digging to find those files again. Those were fun videos.

I’m completely tired today. No good reason to be, except there must be or it wouldn’t be the situation.