She sent yoga pictures today, with her tongue sticking out. She says she likes gentle sex but dirty talk. I almost sent her an artistically-intentioned photo of me in the bath with the right hand holding the phone so it covers my crotch while my other hand is underneath the phone. The implication is that I am masturbating, which I was. But without displaying it directly I think, and she would concur, that it’s more erotic that way. I didn’t send it, though. Don’t want to look too eager, and the truth is she is in another country and probably not traveling from there any time soon. But she is beautiful and unusual.
I feel serene today after accidentally taking a full 2mg of Lorazapam. Usually I take 1mg, if I take anything at all. I keep forgetting the doctor is trying to get me back onto a class of meds that includes Zoloft. Zoloft made me suicidal when I took it years ago. But then it’s possible I was suicidal anyway.
A woman on the elevator yesterday kept calling me a sweetheart, with just a couple of bare sentences exchanged. Does she talk like this to everyone? I think we had a connection. I was in the process of exploring the Fulton Station connection to the J/Z. This provided a path that gets me from Cortlandt Street all the way to the workplace a few blocks away while barely being exposed to any outdoor elements. There was some snow yesterday. Not a whole lot but enough to prompt a revisit of this subterranean passage. In the cours of this Ibriefly met the nice woman with a bag of groceries too heavy to take down the stairs so she got the elevator and I pushed the button to get her to the PATH. So I guess she took her groceries to New Jersey. I’ll never see her again but she seemed so pleased to have encountered a decent, kind man. Am I really any of that or did it just align with my tone of voice and ability to keep the elevator door open long enough for her to get her heavy bag of groceries on board.
I might try to do another something in the spirit of Notes for a Day. It’s a matter of mental energy and focus.