I know why the music is there. It’s for the The Team. (That’s what I am calling the stuffed animals from now on: The Team.)

The Team needs music for their dancing. That is why they summoned it, and the fans and air filter provide it. The Team only dances when I am asleep. They think I don’t know but I’ve woken up a few times and caught glimpses of the action. Some of them dance on the air, because they don’t have any legs. Others dance kind of like half-blossomed flowers, because they simply cannot dance but do not want to be left out.

So that is why the music rises up from these everyday objects. It is not intended to torment or keep me awake. But that is what happens, at least when I am sober.

I shall call it Music Of The Fans, even if one of the music-making objects is not a fan. The name derives from the so-called “Music of the Spheres”, that celestial sound said to resonate throughout the cosmos as a result of planetary movement and space winds. I don’t think this “music” has ever been proven to exist, but that’s no bother. While it is probably impossible to verify its existence with earthly tools the “Music of the Spheres” is a concept that needs no proof. There is music to be heard in the desert winds; in the ocean depths; and in the intermingling of box fans, air filters, and virtually any device generating steady white noise.

In my attempts to silence the MOTF I realized today that while I went as far as putting on earmuffs I neglected to try an obvious tool in my arsenal: the noise-canceling headphones I so adore despite their flakiness. On my next adventure into sobriety I shall remember to try that. I cannot sleep with those things on my head but I can possibly get to there.

So I drank last night, not wanting to submit myself to the Music Of The Fans (MOTF). I did not feel good about drinking again, after just 2 and nearly 3 full days dry. But I had to sleep, and sleep I did. Almost 12 hours solid, after which time I woke up not knowing what happened or where I had been. The Team was exhausted from dancing. They never stop as long as I am asleep, so the longer I sleep the harder they party.

I have heard the MOTF for a long time but coincidentally I have started listening to a podcast called “Unheard”. It is about people who hear voices. I don’t hear what I would call voices in the MOTF but I can fill in Levon Helm or Dr. John singing on top of it all. But the entrance of that podcast into my life has not contributed to my hearing of the MOTF. Just sayin’.