I’ve gotten into a pattern with the anxiety and BP meds. They make the day here seem so much smoother, and quicker. They seem to help make time disappear.
So I take 1½mg Lorazapam and 60mg Nifedipene (sp?). I do not take these pills on days off.
This has been a thing because the previous PCP made me feel guilty for taking these pills at all. I was afraid to use them much for fear he’d stop prescribing altogether.
The new PCP just wants me to feel OK, with no scruples about “controlled substances” and such. He is older, perhaps wiser, though I never trusted the equation of age leading to insight or wisdom. Plenty of older people believe all kinds of stupid shit.
Sometimes the pills mess me up. Make me a little loopy. That’s when I take too much, I guess. Or is it? I don’t even know. I’m experimenting with this shit while workling. That’s good, right?
…
A friend from long ago is in town. We’ve maintained a connection for roughly 27 years. While itinerent some years back she stayed at my place for a few nights. Interesting person. Worldly and intelligent.
