Hearing myself be angry is an ugly, visceral, viscous experience. What happened was I lost my phone. It didn’t disappear. I just couldn’t find it. I thought it had slipped away and under the couch, which at the time (it was late in the day) felt like a lot of heavy lifting. So I said fuck it, I’ll find it in the AM. I think it took 3 or 4 hours, I don’t even remember the time wasted, to discover that it had been swallowed up by the mission recliner chair, which has a number of ways and openings into which objects could fall and not be easily discovered. When I finally peeled it out I honestly could not understand how it got in there.

My quest for recovering the phone of course involved calling it from another phone. It went straight to voicemail, so I guess the battery was already dead and done. It was the next day, after finding the phone and hearing those voicemails, that I found myself listening to my voice screaming and pleading and almost crying. When I’m angry like this I sound like some kind of animal crossed with a petulant child. Maybe that’s really all I am.

I wandered Calvary Cemetery yesterday, intending to make it a walk-and-talk thing using a new microphone that is supposed to be better than the rest. But I’ve had precious little good luck with these kind of levalier mics, and so far it appears the bad luck will continue. Sound quality was poor to a point of being irritating.

I made a pointless jaunt to Huntington, Long Island. $26 just to get out of town but this destination was poorly chosen and poorly planned. I tried to find some joy in somply being on the train and watching the world go by. But it’s a route I’ve taken before, which I did not take into consideration when reserving the seats. There was really nohing there save for a gypsy ATM and a library. Had I planned better I think I would have found the parks and other such places. I nearly got run over by a driver who honestly looked like he did not give a fuck that I had the walk signal crossing New York Avenue. He really drove like I was not supposed to be there. It is not often i experience actual fear when crossing the street, because I am typically very alert and swivel-headed. So this dude barelling right toward was eye-opening. Maybe pedestrian rules are different in Huntington and peds are expected to let the vehicles go first. I don’t know…

Here are some photos from Huntington. They art up their traffic signal control boxes, I should have gotten more photos of those.