Movement

Yesterday. All I wanted was to move. Up at 6am I made short order of grocery shopping. I am consistently being awarded the Senior Discount even though I am not 62, and I do not feel close to 62. I don’t even fuck old but I...

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Filling up

The PBX encountered something I never thought it would. It filled to capacity with .wav files, every last one of them needless and superfluous since I eliminated the “glitch” that was not a glitch. Or did I eliminate...

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Diet is everything?

Feeling much better this day after the last, which was torturous at times. Felt like I’d been eating tree branches. Innards asunder, ass under. Crazy dreams came from that, reminding me of the one strip I could never...

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Working This Day

Working Thanksgiving Day, same as I did last year. Works for me. I’m no fan of holidays. Weird dreams last night. I was in a receiving area adjacent to the Trump Tower. Many of us worked there and knew the grounds but many...

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I Don’t Know What That Is.

I had a horrible Thursday. Something I ate was not good. Had to be some nasty Sweet Tarts candies, but not the usual kind. Some spinoff of the core product in a pill-like form. Had my stomach feeling like a knot, this days after...

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Feel Fine

el fine today after a few days of feeling like I’d been eating tree branches for breakfast lunch and dinner. I read some random source saying that everyone should stop taking Omeprazole immediately. I’ve taken it...

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So many things

Have so much on my mind these days, yet so little to show for it. No action. All thought funnels, emptying into an indifferent sky. I don’t want to talk about most of it, but I do write about it offline, for my...

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Sitting

This spot has taken on some kind of meaning to me. It’s where I sit most workday morning, for about 45 minutes, typing forgettable accounts of the previous days’ adventures and heroics. At this time I am recording...

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27,252 steps? Is that even possible?

Yesterday I walked, but I don’t see how 27k+ steps is even possible. More importantly, I nearly choked yesterday on a sandwich. It was at the Myrtle/Willoughby G train station in Brooklyn. Nobody around, really, and I had...

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Mt. Vernon

Yesterday I made it up to Mount Vernon West on the Metro North. Nice ride up, a bit of a mess on the return, in between I scoped out (what else?) payphones. I found more than expected. Well, put it another way. I knew there...

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DST Got Me

I arose at 5am, after lying wide awake since 4:30. Two days ago this would have been an hour later. I made use of the time, but now I am at work earlier than ever. No problem. I encountered the Marathon yesterday. Props to the...

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Where to go

On Wednesday, I went up to the Bronx, to an area which, on one map at least, would have been called Laconia. I had intended to walk from there to Co-Op City but it was cold and I just didn’t feel the joy. The 5 train from...

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Weather

80 degrees Saturday, Rain and 50s Sunday, 60s and clear Monday. The weather has been messing me up. All seasons in a week. Now it’s daylight savings time on Sunday. Who needs this strangulation of time and temperance? Even...

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Passages

Word comes fast these days. Almost immediately. Whose turn is next? Yours? Your nemesis? Mine? Last month, I learned that an acquaintance from long ago died in his sleep. No cause given, at least not in any circles I could...

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Present

Walking the walk, thinking about the unpaid time spent commuting to and from work. Ways to make it productive. Take notes? Document? Walking from Broadway toward Gold Street, I briefly challenged myself to document something I...

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Leading Versus Teva

What an obscure comparison. Like I’m comparing a pharma to a shoe. The only reason I noticed today that the manufacturer of the Lorazepam I take has changed was because the pills are now twice or even 2.5 times the size of...

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Crazy little thing

Nothing crazy, really. Was watching some porn and the music playing sounded vaguely like “Crazy Little Thing Called Love,” but there was and is nothing crazy to report, I don’t think. I slept poorly. I’ve...

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Payphone Tour Video, and Some Morning Prattle

Some surprises, some failures on this tour of Manhattan’s last publically-accessible pay telephones. Sitting in the break room, by the air conditioner, freezing my ass off, teeth are almost chattering. But I like it. This...

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Ready for Rain

With the first umbrella I can remember ever paying more than $1 for, and with waterproof boots in place, I am ready for the rain. The new umbrella will be bigger than any I’ve ever owned. 53 inches, I think? I will use it...

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Feeling out of place

Yesterday, as with most days, I started writing a bit of whatever, some mental detritus from the pulpit of solitude, when somehow it all vanished. Several sentences of carefully planned, thought-out, pre-chewed then...

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Columbus

It did not lead to too much kerfuffle for me but I had no idea until I got to the office that today was Columbus Day. In fact I did not know until I got all the way upstairs and looked it up. I did not want to appear ignorant by...

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Early as ever

I am not at my usual spot for the morning strawberries and meaningless prattle. All the tables and charis were removed from for use at some event last night. I think it was Family Night, where people brought their kids or...

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Masbate

When I received an email from someone saying she was in Masbate City, I thought it had to be a joke. Where was the “tur” splicing apostrophe? Mas’bate City? Alas, there really is a Masbate City, but the...

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L

I don’t remember now why I intended to title this posting with the letter L. I don’t know what I am anymore. I walked yesterday. It was hot, but among the midtown skyscrapers I had trouble finding places sun could...

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It rained

Like a lot of people, I knew rain was coming, but had no idea it would be the most rain in one day since the 1970s (I think I read that somewhere). Flooding in all the usual places but a few surprises, I guess? Highways and...

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Staying In

Rain is worse than I thought. Waterfalls in subway stations, oh my. I thought it was just going to be steady rain but it’s coming down fast and angry. Maybe not at this moment. Within this office building I am blessedly...

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More rain

It seems my days off, with one memorable exception, all happen to land on beautiful weather days, this amid stormy weather patterns that last for days. Lucky me. Sunday is said to be mid-70s and sunny. Today and tomorrow are...

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Holes

Finding a decent pair of socks proved to be quite a challenge this morning. I found one pair after another, artfully stuffed into itself by laundromat personnel, but every pair seemed to have large and capacious holes. These...

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Early

I get to work early most days. I sit in one of the break rooms and I type. Today I type these words. In earlier days I typed other words. Different words. Someone unfamiliar to me adrressed me by name a few moments ago. I...

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Extremes?

Is life really full of extremes? Some days it seems so. But then I think on it and define that what seems extreme today was routine yesterday, and will be so tomorrow. Sitting naked on the bathtub floor today, showered by...

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5 Days

I think the last 5 days of feeling the life inside me stagnate and form self-gripping fists of self-loathing and disdain have passed for now. I don’t even look at mirrors anymore. I don’t like what I see. But I feel...

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4 Days

I took 2 days off from work, combined with two regular days off amounting to 4 days unmoored. 4 days of not knowing what to do or where to go. Sunday and Monday were rain days, which seemed to enhance whatever feeling of misery...

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What the hell is this?

I spotted this object outside a school. On account of its location I assumed it to be a table game or some sort of educational contraption. Reverse image search turned up a variety of table games. I don’t think this is a...

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MetroCard all the way

I had heard the news but somehow it never seemed like a time to take advantage. I felt like a bit of a n00b yesterday in using, for the first time, a MetroCard to get to Nassau County via the NICEBUS. There is one bus from...

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Rough Night

Dreams were rough and tumble. A homeless dude decided there was a lot of money in my bag and he wanted it. There was no money in my bag so instead he wanted my water. I carry an 8oz. bottle everywhere in case I need to take a...

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Three of us

Only two of us were in the bed. So I knew it could not be her standing over us, reaching down and grabbing our shoulders in repeated attempts to throw us out the door and into the neighbor’s back yard. I woke up, startled...

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Messed up N/R/W

No W at all this AM, and the N was running only every 20+ minutes, or so it seemed. The 7:24 was uncommonly packed, but not insufferably so. I ventured around again yesterday, this time being more cautious about the heat. Sunday...

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Work Away

One of the reasons I welcomed working at an office again after 20 years of doing my own thing was relying on someone else to pay for things like air conditioning, or letting someone else manage the computer network, or letting...

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It Was Hot

I was looking forward to the 90-degree heat. Maybe I should have tamped that enthusiasm. I had no idea where I might want to go, where to spend part of the day. Listlessly I checked on the Little Free Library and the Community...

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Fresh Pants, New Shirt

Sartorially I feel a little different than usual. Brand new shirt. Have not had one of those in over a year. Short sleeves with no pocket. Not tuckable. Casual but classy. I think I’d been wearing the same pants for a...

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Porest FaRK

Getting my Forest Park video ready. It ended up being almost an hour. I have other videos from earlier. I don’t know why I went ahead with this one first but it’s not like I’m on any kind of deadline. As I...

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Late Being Early

I’m a little late today, only an hour early versus the usual 1.5 or so. In a previous post I think I mentioned that I saw a woman on the subway who I had not seen for months. She is interesting to me for her art and...

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Time for Another Day

Word on the radio was that subways were a disaster all around. I had no problems. Seems delays were all about the 1/2/3, I think, and of course the new and never-ending F/M debacle. I purchased a cheap piece of technology, with...

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I Have no Banana Today

My morning routine had come to settle on 16 ounces of strawberries and a single banana. I neglected the banana, thinking it might go bad overnight or over 2 days. Here I am bananaless. Sans banana. I am in a state of NON-BANANA....

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A Lot of Questions

Dude who sells me strawberries, once in a while, will ask a whole lot of questions. Today he asked why I go to work so early. In an earlier episode he had asked what time my job starts. I told him 9am. He obviously remembered...

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Tony

Yesterday I spotted, quite by chance, a headline in a hyper-local Queens newspaper. It mentioned...

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Day 2

The new gig at the same company started yesterday. I’m in training now, which has periods of abject boredom that drive me to near panic. That happened a lot during the first rounds of training last year. I blacked out huge...

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Monday Monday

My first day on the new division. Not certain where to go or when to log in. I don’t care too much about all this, the change of job function. It’s the same task just not as urgent or anxiety-stoking. Yesterday sent...

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The Future Is Mine

It’s probably not worth getting terrifically excited about. But for the moment I’m happy as ass. Mobing to the new division of this company at last, something like 9 months after being told I would start in 2 weeks....

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Extra Early, or Under Late?

Got here maybe a half hour earlier than usual. Nobody here. I could work this shift if I asked nicely. The overnight. I might have been wired for that in earlier years but not anymore. It’s also hard to get. Folks on the...

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Sunday Looks Good

Things finally moving again at the workplace. I don’t like to blab on about work but I’ve become happy here. That’s not my normal disposition. I don’t talk about it much because no one wants to hear from...

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A Woman Masturbating

I was engaged in a pitifully mundane task. Punching 19 digits and a 4-digit PIN to see how much money was left on an Applebee’s gift card that’s been in my wallet for something like 7 years. Sitting outside the...

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Yesterday was Baisley

Baisley Pond Park had been on my list of things to see for I don’t know how long. Hard to say why, except that it is there, on a map, looking strangely enticing. I chose a perhaps misbegotten route, from the A train...

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Mabobs

That word came to mind yesterday when someone mentioned my websites to me. I update this one but few people know of it. The payphone site, though, that’s become a thingamabob. I don’t know where websites fit in to...

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I Know Better

As habits go mine is probably typical. I think highly of myself, but quickly quash that instinct with post-natal discoveries of weakness, character flaws, arrogances and fallibilities. I am nothing. I do not inhabit or inform...

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Needs So Little

I was looking at a woman on the N train yesterday. She was small, occupied minimal space, and seemed to move only when necessary. Whatever that means. Her purse was smaller than some of the pockets in my new messenger bag, her...

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People Talk

I think it’s food. All anyone talks about is food. Indirectly, when discussing the nuclear...

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Bites and Grabs: “Who’s There?”

Something biting my arm and squeezing the back of my neck felt so real I had to wake up twice and shine light on my arm to be certain no creature or other had sunk its teeth or claws into me. Through the nearly rigor-mortis...

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Saturday

Coming in on a Saturday after 3 days off feels… off. I’m still peeved at missing Oppenheimer, but I’ll get over it. For the prices those tickets run I would have expected a reminder email. Seriously. I got...

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At the Rose

It is not the first time since it reopened that I’ve been here but it’s the first time I arrived intending to stay more than a few gawking minutes at the Rose Main Reading Room. This is the old Rose. I guess. They...

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New Breakfast

Plums and a banana. Not the ritual one pound of strawberries I had started to question my allegiance to. A pound of plums costs about the same as the strawberries, and takes up a lot less space in my bag seeing as it is not...

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Smoke

Apparently there was a smoke condition along the 4/5/6 lines today So they shut off the air conditioning. This quickly made conditions very uncomfortable. I almost immediately started sweating, and I was seated. The lack of a/c...

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New friend

I’ve entered into a new correspondence with an artist/pornographer/ We talk freely about sex, masturbation, her breasts. SHe has the most active mind of any woman I can remember having met through any of the porn sites....

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New Day?

If it lives up to my hype, this could be a day for the record books, or a day to point at and say that this is when I decided to stay at this company for longer than anticipated. I’ve already been here longer than...

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Yellowish Mold

At the 175th Street A train station yesterday. It used to be my everyday station. 30 years ago, I think. I was surprised at how the station looks exactly the same today as I remember it all those years ago. The same yellowish...

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Masked

I go into a certain marketplace around here for one reason. I want to know what the woman I used to be pretty flirty with looks like. I have never seen her without a mask, and she uses masks to cover about as much of her face as...

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Friday

Nothing new to say today. Like most days. I saw something on my work schedule for next week that took me 24 hours to question. I have a full day of “TRAINING” but I know not what this is for. If it’s what I...

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The return of the referral

Maybe this insurance I have, said to be about as good as it gets in the working world, isn’t all that. I did get 5-figures worth of dental work done for nothing paid by me. There is that, and that had been on my list of...

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Slightly Imperfect

I am wearing strange-to-me underwear. It’s not my usual loose-fit. It’s not clamping my junk but it’s tighter than usual. But it’s fine. The more interesting detail is how I came into possession of a set...

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Somethingness

When one of the people who usually sits near me did not show up for a couple of days I’d assumed he was fired. That’s how it goes here. Nice guy, mild-mannered, here one day, gone the next. Turns out he was not...

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Another Day

I’m still thinking about Joe. I suppose I will be for a long time, for all time. An enduring, virtually constant presence for over 23 years. Always magnanimous with his thoughts and praise for others. I had always thought...

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Stupid Commute

Saturdays did not used to be such a mess. One time I ended up walking from the Brooklyn Bridge/City Hall station but that was no problem. Today everything was a mess. The N only went as far as Queensboro Plaza, so I thought...

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Rain Late

I didn’t expect such rain. Exiting at Fulton and Dey it was pouring rain. No one seemed to have expected it. Nary an umbrella in sight. I had time, though. Being over an hour early every day has its advantages at times...

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Kind of a mess

A stramble up Hillside way turned into a bit of a mess yesterday. I wanted to bake in the 90-degree sun but not quite like this. Felt I had no control over anything. All the while I was assaying this area as if I might move...

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One-Eyed Jackie

I spotted Jackie Kennedy somewhere in New York. She knew me, a little bit. We made chitchat before...

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Objectively…

It might have been considered cute. Naked in the shower, masturbating, trying to share the joy with like-minded, similarly engaged individuals around the world. But I couldn’t figure out the technology. The hardware (huh...

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Foodz

Dookie Cough Cot Hoffee Gubble Bum Peck Blapper Cap Cukes Trench Foast Rathboom Whole Wheat Claw Rams Muna Telt Spanana Blit Chork Pops Cab Crakes Dot Hog Mocolate Chilk Robster Loll Ficken Chingers Steese Chicks Schneach Papps...

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Manhattan Beach

I did not write anything here yesterday, as I do most workdays. I was, by my standards, a little late. For me being an hour early is being late. I was late enough that my equilibrium tipped. The day before yesterday I made it to...

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July

I paid the rent. Made amends. Now I catalog the crises. Time to get repairs. Time to face the...

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What to think?

I don’t know where I am. I’m here. Present and accounted. But I’m just floating. I roam city streets with no awareness of the present. Is this a dangerous location? Am I being stared at? Am I being secretly...

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